disorderly

it's time to change things, even if it means living an ascetic life for now.
it's time to bring about order, even if it means dictating my life on paper everyday.
it's time to be disciplined, and sustain it through and maintain it throughout.

IF I want to get somewhere, and not drift around aimlessly,
IF I want to be able to separate my work worries from personal worries,
IF this is what these 6 months has taught me.

And the time is now. *someone buy me an organizer that syncs with my computer that syncs with my ipod that syncs with my handphone.* ignorethepreviouslinerubbish.

*note to self
recheck priorities
evaluate time spent on low priorities
evaluate how to shift time around (whee~)

Even if

Even if this is a dream,
even if it is not reality,
there are things that I've never seen,
things that I've never tasted,
things I've never experienced.

Even if the reality as I know crumbles into a million pieces,
I could still hang on, holding these pieces,
crafting together a landscape of dreams and reality.

Even if you are not here,
even if I'm still in a dark tunnel right now,
even if there's no return route,
even if I'm being hounded by my fears and heartaches,
even if I'm still confused,
even if I'm still lost.
Even if.

I still want to move forward,
I still want to believe,
I still want to carry on in my dreamscape.
To dance, to sing, to enjoy the cool night breeze,
to jump, to run, to soak in the warm bright sun.
To teach myself to be myself, not to fear being laughed at,
to be myself, not to be afraid of umscalable obstacles.
And lead myself onwards into the mysterious wonderful mesmerizing winding path of life.

*this took 1 week to transfer from my ipottouch to here. zzz. not very polished yet though. lazy to do more.